Project Butterflies: Q&A

CTV journalist Galit Solomon started a website to provide support and information for survivors of sexual abuse

There years ago at a gala in Toronto, Galit Solomon stood in front of a large crowd with an untold secret. It was her birthday and she was asked to speak at an event for the York Region Abuse Program. It was the first time she had told strangers she was a survivor.

After experiencing sexual assault as a child in Israel, Solomon, a journalist at CTV News, started Project Butterflies, a website that provides information and support for survivors of sexual abuse.

Why did you start “Project Butterflies?”
It started four years ago when the mayor of Vaughn asked me to host a gala for York Region Abuse Program, an organization that’s located in Newmarket. They serve the entire York Region, ten municipalities, specifically dealing with child sexual abuse and adults who were abused as children.

I’ve done events for all sorts of organizations, but this one really hit close to home.
When people look at you walking down the street, or if they watch you on TV as you’re reporting, it’s not like there’s a sign that can give it away. With certain ailments there are physical scars that are left behind, but with this, there isn’t. She put me in touch with the York Region Abuse Program and I told her I was delighted but I also felt it was important that (the mayor) knew I was a survivor myself.

The thing with child and sexual abuse is that there is a tendency to hold it as a secret. Often as a person going through the experience you are told by the perpetrator you have to keep this a secret, because your parents will not approve.

I went through a healing process and it was very rewarding and at the end of it I thought, “What can I do?” What can I do to also make people who have been through this experience feel like they are not alone? And this was my biggest problem—being isolated. The point of me doing this is telling people they don’t have to be alone.

The healing process inspired the name Butterfly Project, can you talk a little bit about that?
Butterflies go through an ugly process in order to come out they way they do. I think a lot of people likened the process of going through therapy or counselling as being one of those things. There are moments when you feel naked, ugly and it hurts, but at the end of it, you come out and you’re stronger because of it. My dad passed away four years ago and my boyfriend never got the chance to meet him, so we went to the cemetery. It was strange because it was November and it was cold outside and there were all these butterflies. We walked over to bench and they followed us. The next day he was at work sitting in his vehicle and looked up and saw a butterfly. It felt like bit of a moment. Some people might say it’s a coincidence, but for us, it was a symbol.

Going back to the speech, where did that courage come from?
I didn’t plan on saying it but I knew I was going to say something. I chose not to prepare a speech. It was the first time I remember not being so prepared, but I chose to do it that way because I wanted to (speak) from the heart.

What is your survivor story?
I had a very close friend when I was living in Israel and just before we left to move to Canada, we had sold our house in the “old neighbourhood.” One day I went to the “old neighbourhood” to visit my friends and I went over to her place, she wasn’t there but her dad just arrived home. He (told me to) come back in a half hour. So I went to go see some friends and came back and he opened the door. He said, “she’s still not here, why don’t you come in and call her?” Obviously, when you’re12 years old and you know this person, you’re not going to think anything of it. I don’t know how many times I’ve seen him before, but he was very affectionate with his kids and would always give me a hug when I saw him. There was a feeling of comfort, it was almost like family. I didn’t think twice about it and why would you (as) a child? I was going to leave and that’s when it happened.

What happened after the incident, did you tell anyone?

I almost put a lid on it and I wasn’t going to let it out. First of all, I was told not to and I was afraid of my family. I knew something happened that I wasn’t at the time able to make sense of. Then you place all this blame on you and all these questions start coming up in your head about it. I didn’t say anything for four years. I think the fact that we left Israel was helpful for me. I thought I would be able to forget about it. And I wasn’t. At 16 I did tell (someone), but I never really told anyone in such a public way.

Do you think as a journalist you have an advantage working with people in the community?
I think we have a responsibility to do it. For me it’s my way of giving back. My schedule is full now, but it’s full of stuff I love to do. I am very passionate about it.

What has the response been like?

It hasn’t been a surprise for me, because I know there is a need for this. York Region’s Abuse Program says that one in four girls and one in five boys will be abused before the age of 16. I am glad there is a response because that means people are starting their healing process—and that’s the point.

What’s been the hardest part?
The first few entries I wrote on the blog were difficult for me. It was hard for me trying to figure out what to say. Sometimes it’s almost like you’re reliving some of it.

What are your goals with the organization?
It’s growing in different ways. I’ve heard from all sorts of people who have had all sorts of questions about their own experiences. The first thing for me is to reach those who have been through the experience, hopefully through sharing my own experience and putting a face on it, because there’s a lot of shame that exists around the concept of child and sexual abuse.

For more information, check out www.projectbutterflies.org.

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